Week 3: Power Rankings

Get excited! It’s time for another round of the Bachelor Burn Book Power Rankings!

Week three of Sean’s reign as the Bachelor wasn’t the most exhilarating two hours of television we’ve ever watched, but it was certainly very telling. For one, we learned that Kacie B. is a firm believer in self-sabotage. We also found out that Lindsay isn’t all that bad and … well, Tierra is. Finally, we were able to confirm through our very reliable and top secret sources that Kristy likes to have big hair so she can, in fact, fill it with secrets. So, why are these little nuggets of wisdom important? Because without them, we wouldn’t be able to form the superficial and premature judgments that make up these awesome power rankings!

Before we get started, let’s get all the Bachelor Burn Book n00bs caught up. If you’re not familiar with our power rankings, here’s how it works:

Every week, we’ll tell you who we think did the best, who did the worst and who got completely lost in the shuffle on the latest episode of The Bachelor. We’ll rank (and kind of judge) the women based on their interactions with each other and with Sean. Of course, we’ll factor in how we think Sean views each of his female suitors, as well. Just think of it as if we’re seating the women at the appropriate tables in the Mean Girls cafeteria.

Week 3

1. Lesley M.

Last week: #2

There’s no doubt at this point that Lesley is a legit contender to win the final rose and Sean’s heart. She’s genuine, down-to-earth and super chill, and it’s obvious that Sean is captivated by her. We could list every reason why we’ve become such big Lesley fans, but at this point, we feel it’s necessary to only mention one. Lesley truly won us over this week when she told Sean that she loved high school. Umm, hello?! It’s so obviously because she was the Queen Bee, the leader of The Plastics. You know high-school-aged Lesley had her high-status man candy, technically good physique and ignorant band of loyal followers. And for this reason alone, she tops this week’s rankings.

2. AshLee

Last week: #5

All of you AshLee fans out there can breathe a sigh of relief, for she has regained control of her initial #2 spot in the Bachelor Burn Book Power Rankings. AshLee could not have handled the week’s circumstances more gracefully and selflessly. She calmly and patiently waited as Sean tended to Tierra’s fabricated wounds, and even more admirably, she was openly excited about spending the day with the two girls from Starlight Children’s Foundation. Most women would not have handled sharing their time with Sean as well as AshLee did, especially during the Tierra fiasco. If AshLee continues to “play the game” as well as she is now, she’ll be staying in that mansion for quite a while.

3. Desiree

Last week: #1

Despite her lack of time with Sean this week, Desiree continues to be a strong contender in the house. It’s clear that Sean is into her, and he made every effort to let her know that when he saw her. We anticipate her staying at the top of this list for a while, but we do have one small concern that’s worth mentioning. Desiree seems to get easily rattled by the other women–namely, Amanda–and their shenanigans. We really hope she’s not one of those women who is constantly sounding the “she’s not here for the right reasons” alarm. Relax, Des. Just focus on you and Sean and everything else will fall into place … maybe.

4. Lindsay

Last week: #7

Boy, did this girl come out of nowhere or what! Lindsay was fixin’ to get herself sent home–wedding dress and all–the first night, but things sure have taken a turn in her favor. While she probably is a drunken, crazy mess at times, Lindsay has proven that she does have another side … one that makes an appearance when she’s sober. And it is this side that Sean is really starting to like, so much so that she was awarded the group date rose. It looks like Lindsay is poised to make it pretty far in this competition, and we’re actually kind of excited to see where her relationship with Sean goes.

5. Tierra

Last week: #4

Tierra pretty much just sucks, and we wish we didn’t have to put her in our top five. Tierra comes across as an immature, whiny, conniving little girl who is used to getting her way, and dear God, is she annoying. Her little spill down the stairs, while it may have been real, was definitely dramatized. She realized she could milk it for all it was worth, and that’s exactly what she did. Was she concussed? Perhaps. Does that change our opinion of her? Not in the least. Nevertheless, Sean is still giving her copious amounts of attention, so in the top five she shall remain.

6. Sarah

Last week: #3

Sean reaffirmed his strong interest in Sarah this week when he so adorably surprised her with a visit from her dog, Leo. How thoughtful! We’re fairly certain Sarah will be around for quite a while longer, but as we explained last week, this relationship probably has a ceiling, which is kind of unfortunate. Sarah is a breath of fresh air from The Bachelor’s usual crazy, obsessive, dramatic contestants. She could totally sit with us if she wanted to.

7. Selma

Last week: #10

Selma is sneaky sneaky! She quietly sits back week after week, but this girl is about to do some damage. Based on the previews, it looks like Selma gets a one-on-one date next week, and we’re betting this will be America’s formal introduction to Selma as a frontrunner. We don’t know much about her at this point, but she is super gorg. If her looks are any indication of her personality, Selma may be chillin’ in the mansion for a good while.

8. Robyn

Last week: #8

Get ready y’all, because Robyn is about to turn up the heat! I’m sure you all saw the preview for next week … you know, the one that shows Robyn asking Sean which “chocolate” he wants to taste. Girl’s got some serious cojones! We’re still not entirely sold on Robyn and her chances with Sean, but boy, she deserves mad respect for coming on this show and holding her own. We have certainly underestimated Robyn thus far, so we’re eager to see if her honesty and boldness carries her into the “serious contender” category.

9. Catherine

Last week: #9

What happened to this girl? This show is on for two hours every week, and we see Catherine approximately 3.7 seconds of those two hours. Usually, we get a little golden nugget of wit from her during the 3.7 seconds, but that’s about it. Catherine seems really cool, but we haven’t seen enough of her to know for sure! This is a tough situation to figure out. The fact that she and Sean are hardly ever shown together makes us think she’s destined for an early limo ride to the airport. On the other hand though, we don’t know enough about her to relegate her to this fate just yet. Basically, we know nothing.

10. Leslie H.

Last week: #16

We’re not exactly sold on putting Leslie H. in our top 10, but we did so mostly because of the preview for next week. Yeah, we’re cheating a little bit by basing Leslie’s ranking off something we haven’t seen yet, but whatever. We make the rules here. Anyway, it looks like Leslie and Sean spend some good quality time together next week. Maybe this will turn Leslie into a legitimate contender, but we also wouldn’t be surprised if Sean isn’t feeling the connection and sends her home.

11. Jackie

Last week: #12

You know, from what little we have seen of Jackie, we actually kinda like her. She’s got mad potential, but she hasn’t been able to get enough time with Sean to stand out. Perhaps Jackie isn’t getting air time now because the producers want to trick us into thinking she’s about to get sent home, but we’re not so optimistic about that scenario. Jackie has to do something bolder than just kissing Sean’s cheek while wearing red lipstick because if she doesn’t, she really will be left standing without a rose.

12. Amanda

Last week: #13

Amanda is just plain weird. We don’t think she has some master plan to purposely act like Jekyll and Hyde, despite what the other women might think. We honestly believe she’s just seriously out there. Regardless of how it came to his attention, Sean is now aware that Amanda isn’t exactly making a ton of BFFs in the house. If he’s not feeling a connection with her, this just gives him one more reason to send her home that much sooner.

13. Daniella

Last week: #14

Daniella likes to drink. Daniella is funny … in a pathetic sort of way. Daniella is probably more suited for a stint on Bachelor Pad than a season on The Bachelor. Daniella better start stealing all the liquor from the mansion while she can because pretty soon, she’ll no longer have access to it.

Eliminated

14. Kacie B.

One would think Kacie B. would’ve learned not to break the cardinal rule of The Bachelor after being on Ben’s season last year. You do not, under any circumstances, bring the drama of the house to the Bachelor’s attention. We’re not sure why Kacie decided to do this, but either way, she didn’t seem too broken up about getting the boot.

15. Taryn

Gosh, Taryn. If only you had won “the most important game of your life,” maybe you wouldn’t have gotten sent home. Yeah, actually, you probably would’ve.

16. Kristy

We are so happy that we no longer have to deal with Kristy and all of her annoyingness. Come on, you know that girl was just on the show for the exposure and attention.

Thanks for tuning in! Love ya!

Want more Bachelor Burn Book? Follow us on Twitter @bachelorburnbk. We live tweet during every episode and offer our insights throughout the week on all things Bachelor-related.

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2 thoughts on “Week 3: Power Rankings

  1. I love reading y’all’s weekly witticisms. They really make for a nice (and HILARIOUS) break from all this med school madness (I won’t bore you with details). Your other posts are also very entertaining. I hope y’all keep this up for many seasons to come!

    -Lonely Med Student in BFE

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